Camp is almost over!!!!

Camp is over tomorrow. i haven't decided if i'm sad or happy.... i lil bit of both i think. it is sweet and sour i guess.........
anyways, about camp, do you think you can get sexualy abused/harassed by an 8 yr old???
i'll have to tell you the story some time. very embarassing and very funny and somewhat disturbing.........

yes i've had a much better day today. stupid swc thing was gettin me down too i think.

tell Erica i say "HI!!!"
and have fun!!! i wish i could get together with you guys!! but we;re going up to NH and won't be back until Thurs. or Fri of next week and by then your b-day will be over and she'll be gone.

so now i don't have anything else left to write.....
except that i'm glad i have you to listen. cuz i'm so confused about school and school life and my life and everything.
it seems so weird that we're gonna be juniors and stuff. and it still is sooo weird haveing friends at school...... i know that must sound weird, but it's so true.
and yeah..... we need to have a long conversation again, before school, and in person.....
ttyl

L.I.T - loser in training.... hehehehehe (really at camp they;re leaders, but this is funnier)

stupid corruption

the stupidist thing is that the only hateful-ish word i can use to explain things is Stupid!

that is really sTUPID!!!

i have no further vocab stored or anyother useless info that can help me in this endevor.

 

did you know that angst is "fear" in German.

 

i'm trying to collect words. to begin the furthering of my newfoung vocabulary. but i don't want a newfound vocab. i don't even know what i want. and that is why i am complaining and being a stupid (yet again) person and complaining about my stupid freakin' unimportant life. and i hate my stupid freakin' self for it.

and that is why i'm going to stop ranting and at least take joy in reading something and go back into my case of a shell. cuz i'm sick of acting again. and i was never normal, nor i will never be normal. and this is what camp does to you. i no longer want to sing stupid camp songs and pretend that the world is fair and hunky-dorey when it clearly isn't! i'm not naturaly enthusiastic, nor am i always happy and perky. and i think i can be a pessimist more than an opptimist. and i'm sick of pretending or saying opstimistic things. and i'm sick of fighting with her. and i'm sick of complaining. and i'm sick of writting. And i hope noone EVER has to read through this thing except a very more mature and condiscending older self (myself i mean). and then i can laugh at how stupid a 16 yr old can be when trying to cope with stupid freakin'  life. if i even live to see a normal day, but not a monotinous one.

and i can't believe i'm writting this.

i hope noone is reading this.

because it makes me sound full of myself and slightly obsessed and majorly inmature and full of stupid freakin' rageing hormones or whatever the docs call it when you get pissed for no damn reason.....

and my life isn't all half bad.

i mean, i live a pretty good life.

and i should like a pretty long time, if i'm not killed by some stupid outbrake of poison ivy.  

 

--
skwerl

Life Sucks

yeah it really does.
even though i'm trying to chillax or whatever i'm still very mad at .... well basically the world. and so i'm ranting on my blog about how overly self absorbed in my own stupid pitiful life.
and to hell with it all.
i wish i wouldn't/couldn't wish.
would it just be easier not to have emotions or feelings at all. just a shell of (un)human kindness????

words are just spilling out of my fuming head.
and then i get mad at myself because i have nothing to be mad about, or what i am mad about has no revalence nor any importance except to my own selfish being.

and now i will stop ranting, no longer bug you, and hopefully remember to send that e-mail.